GROW UP(my birthday mix)

GROW UP that was what a girl friend told me when i made a stupid joke in class, the phrase made me feel remorseful although it was aimed at shutting me up. i then took hold of the word, chewed and digested it, this action made me reminisce my journey from pampers to tissue paper.

in retrospect of what i was like as a young boy, soft toned, chubby cheeks, fresh smooth skin, cute fingers, peaceful playful habits, nobody could help but show me love minus times i pooh pooh and urinate. just like most kids out there i had this charm that was hard to resist.

i never really cared for anyone except my parents, sister and food, my thoughts were as clean as clean, my hate list was scanty, just the family doctor, my maths teacher, Segun Arinze and Abacha(R.I.Pieces). i woke up daily without fear for anything except those in my hate list, i had no crushes, contacts, it was basically eat, sleep, play.

As the calender marked December 27 of every year, the delineation became clearer, i then began to realise I'm not supposed to be forever young, all of a sudden i had too many people to care about, my thoughts became occupied, all what used to mean a lot to me became callow and immature, my once scanty hate list witnessed  expeditious increase, i had too many friends to watch out for and please, painfully lost some in the process, started being conscious of my body structure, skin, clothes i wear. i began to grow hair in unnecessary places. i had bumps to worry about, my once playful habits turned violent, the whole picture became complicated.

Since I'm no longer a kid, i can no longer play police and thief with friends, sit with my father's friends, get anything i want by crying, can't run round the house naked, sleep in between my parents at night, it goes on and on. truth is i miss all these and wish it could go on for some more time, but like my friend told me I've got to grow up.

if you ask anybody how he sees him or herself as a parent, they probably envision themselves with their partner and "young children". Nobody wants to imagine a grown up child, every parent wants to forever have his baby. what i probably need to do now is to live and enjoy my time by doing things i won't regret in future, and first on the list is my Education.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME

The Three Wise Women and Dapo

in a neighbourhood parents will lock their wards indoors to protect their future individuality you won’t want to be home alone with your old folks, well I happen to be a victim of that scene though it was for a few couple of years but I found it hard before being inured to my condition.

I grew up with three lovely sisters (Yetty,Bolly,Deo) Yetty was my elder sister while Bolly and Deo were close family friends.  We did lot of stuff together, attended the same primary school, and interchangeably attended church, watched movies together, a lot of my childhood highlight was in the company of these three beauties. I was proud to be the lone guy amidst three lovely girls, not every guy has that chance, though they suffered me small o, but we thank God.

It was a very painful experience to witness the perfect picture fade right under my gaze, it was mainly for no other reason than because I was the guy. They all went to an all girls secondary school and I was left alone with my parents. Resumption nights at home was always a horror day for me, I’ll codedly find a secret spot to lick my tears, I was successful in hiding my true feelings about them leaving for school until now, I always gave them the I don’t care attitude just to prove how manly I am.

Just like a broken mirror it has been extremely hard to put together that once perfect picture as it has been swept away by the time phenomenon

DEOLA

YETUNDE

BOLA

I can proudly say today that a huge part of who I am was in the hand of these 3 angels and I don’t have any regrets.

Times have changed, trees have grown, professors retired, even justin bieber is dating, so have we developed. I’ve gotten to that stage I hardly see any of them. Deola is presently in her service year, Yetty and Bolly are both undergoing their masters programme in separate institutions and my lonely self is in his penultimate year in a private university.

To the three girls that made me, I unofficially say a big thank you for the moments, to Deola I’ll miss making pancakes with you, 80% on the same side during our arguments with others even though you’re not always right just giving you support to make it two-two(hope you’ll forgive me) to Bola I’ll miss your tasty meals and our unisex gists, and to my sister Yetunde I want to finish typing before this year runs out so In summary I’ll say I never wished for a better sister, you rock. And for all your buts and commas I’ll keep it for a later day.

DAY I GOT NAKED

If what happened to me on this fateful day was a scene in one of Mr. Ibru’s film, you would have been forced to start your stomach (laff), ok let me not lift your expectations, it might turn out not to be funny and in turn lead to another embarrassing moment for me, but as at now this remains one of my top most embarrassing moments in life. It was the story of the day I got naked in my bathroom.

December 2008 couldn’t have ended in a more emphatic fashion, we were early enough to celebrate yuletide in our new house and I get to sleep in a bedroom I call my own, shower in my bathroom, u needed to see the way I was blushing on this day. I spent the first night in my room, it wasn’t too cold nor warm, it was just perfect. I spent the early hours of the next morning arranging and rearranging the room until I ran out of tsn(the style network) ideas, it then occurred to me “shower time”

I turned to my room door, reached for the knob and twisted the key until I heard KPRAM, did a quick strip dance for my pillow, i saw my towel but left it in the room, I mean what’s the use since the room door is locked I can do what I like(that’s what I thought) I entered my bathroom and closed the door in Adam’s kinda suit, took my time in the shower, brushed my teeth, scrubbed my unmentionables, shampooed my hair, in short I had my bath. After I was convinced that I’ve had a clean bath, I made way for the exit only to get the shock of my life.

I turned the door knob of the bathroom door and it had no effect, tried it over and over and over and over, but it still didn’t open, realizing I was naked and stranded I sat on my closet and placed my hands above head. i could hear my phone ring in the bedroom but it was the least of my problem. In my head I was contemplating whether to shout or to chillax until someone in the house misses my presence, I eventually decided to chill, after like 30minutes it seemed like nobody was missing me so I had to try the other option but it had no effect either.

After like an hour food was ready and mum wanted to find out why I wasn’t out early for breakfast, on hearing her footsteps I screamed then she came by and I explained the whole incident to her screaming. The chairman of the house heard of this and I could smell his breath of anger from where I was sitting.

They called for the carpenter and they were able to break into my room, before they set me free. The moment they opened the door, I saw my mom, dad, and the carpenter, I didn’t know if I was to cover my unmentionable with my hand or just free it, run to grab my towel or just walk to pick it, in the end I stood looking at the trio looking at me looking at them.

My room key was seized and I never asked for it since I don’t intend locking my room ever again until my honeymoon sha. I can never forget that day, to think of it our family friends came over shortly after the incident.

It’s Freezing Dry, not Boring!!!

A good friend of mine (Babatunde Apampa), inspired by the cold weather wrote this beautiful piece, i stole it from him and decided to put it on my blog. ENJOY!!!!!

Cruel in nature, life zapping in conquest, as sharp as a blade he slices with one feel of his swiftness. He dominates the day and even the night, he is like a knight, vicious in ambition and shrewd in personality. He is either hot, cold or both, but nobody leaves the story untold. He is the only one who can make a man shiver and sweat at the same time and anyone who dares mention his name, he seizes their lips and sucks the moisture from it. He is The Spirit of Hamarttan.

In a land, far, fAR, FAAAAR away from civilisation, a land known as Bowen, The Spirit of Hamarttan chooses his victims. The land is populated mostly by delicately framed females, harmless male creatures, livestock and vast acres of vegetation, a perfect location for the cruelty of his personality.

Like a thief, he waits patiently for the fall of the sun and the rise of the moon, more so for the candles in every room to vanish into harmless fumes. Just when everything seems peaceful and calm, he attacks with full force, slicing the lips of the people, freezing their waters, drying the vegetation and making Vaseline man’s best friend. His presence is sharper than a thousand bayonets.

When dawn comes, and the surviving able bodied of Bowen go to the fountain to fetch, he attacks yet again, blowing crystal sharp winds, making them shiver and his best attack is with cold water...

...But not everyone is scared of him. Infact, a few enjoy his presence for the reasons: no sweat, quick laundry, the chance to wear their fashionable sweaters and the chance to keep their lovers warm in their arms...They do not know what they are in for, the ones that do not fear. The Spirit of Hamarttan becomes more vicious with time. He is angry...

Babatunde Henry Apampa

Smooth