A DAY WITH KIDNAPPERS

Can imagine what the old woman would have been thinking that sunny afternoon, her grandson got abducted by aliens, got kidnapped for ransom, rapture occurred, he just disappeared, choose what you want, truth is i willingly walked out the door to satisfy a desire I couldn’t let down. This is the story of the day I got neighbours and well-wishers thinking I got kidnapped.

Grandma came to visit, and she would be sleeping over for few days, I was happy to have her around, only that she was an hindrance to my habitual fun time with my grown friend, bro Muyiwa(most of my friends were far older than me) We’ll talk about stuff, really learned a lot from him, watched movies together and my favourite part computer games. At the slightest of chances, I’ll run to his house, and now that mom and Dad were not at home was the perfect time to go have fun

 I had to make sure my assistance won’t be needed at all in the house, so I made everything she’ll probably be needing for the next one hour available. i inserted a movie in our 3 disc changer Samsung dvd "the king and Ann" and made sure she was watching with the hope she’ll sleep off soon enough. After few minutes I told her I wanted to buy biscuit just over the street and I took off never to be seen in like six hours.

As soon as I got to my destination, I forgot the chronicle of the whole day, the day was going just as I expected, I lost track of time, 1hr seemed like 10minutes. By the time it was 60minutes by my own conversion, I heard a knock on the gate, Liu kang was beating the shit out of Kai, I paused the game and went to check who was at the gate only to see a team of community volunteers on a search hunt. From their reaction I knew I would be singing R Kelly’s "if I could turn back the hands of time" in a couple of minutes.

When I got home I didn’t know what do or say, I just went inside my room to sleep. The neighborhood was buzzing with rumours that I had been kidnapped. The lucky part was that my parents were not around during the whole drama, by the time they came back from work the dust had settled. They were more absorbed in the story than the lead actor.

A WEEKEND OUT OF SCHOOL

Leaving school during session isn't one of my things, but when i got an invitation to attend my friend's sister's wedding i made it my thing for once. this is the story of the weekend i made a new friend.

i left school early enough to make it for the reception. The reception took place in a big hotel in Ejigbo, the atmosphere was the typical Naija wedding scene,  women on gele running helter skelter, big boys in shades, men in agbada with newspapers peeping out of their armpits, ambiance of food cries "ai ti get ounje nibi bayii o, e gbe moinmoin lo si side ibeyen"the music suited the occasion. By the time i got there i was famished, my host(Akin) was able to take a break from his aburo iyawo duties and brought me fried and jollof rice with meat and chilled coke. at that moment i felt like doing MJ's moon walk and hugging him but i just told him "thanx bro"

By the time reception was over, we(Me, Akin and his in-law) decided to chill at the venue before we leave for our hotel, we gisted for some minutes before we got bored to tears and decided to call the spices of life to come and spice up our discussion. in 5 minutes three known ladies to the guys walked up to our seat, one sat with each of us, i was using one side of my eyes to scope my pick and my other eyes was at my phone(snake xenzia). the other guys got to business and were already deep in conversation with their cohorts. Akin noticed i wasn't talking to the other girl. he then did an extended introduction and got back to his acquaintance, at that point i was expected to take off but i wasn't in the mood for chin wagging. i tried my best though to bring her back to life cos she was very busy with her phone too.

ME; ....................so what university are you   

HER; I'm still in secondary school

ME; so what class

HER; SS2(first term for dat matter)

ME; WOW

i glanced at Akin and gave him a frown, i continued chatting with her and most of our talk was on her secondary school(do you have a school daughter? bla bla bla talk) i was crying deep inside that this people should let us start going. she kept on talking and i just wished she could kiss the sky for once, she told me to excuse her and left me, for a moment i was thanking God, she then called and told me to walk down, Akin had earlier left so i thought it was our cue to leave not knowing the party just started, i went after her and asked her where Akin was, she had no idea, she then told me to come with her. as if i was hypnotized i trailed her behind until we got to a less crowded place let me say, something close to a dark corner, i was enjoying the drama cos i wanted to know what will evolve that night, i then tried to talk but she halted me saying "let's forget about my school jare" she then started asking personal questions like my age, my number in the family and so on. i gave her any answer and told her it would be better we check on the others before they leave me behind, she was a bit reluctant but i insisted. 

we left the place and went back to our former location, i even felt ashamed walking beside her, anybody looking at us will mistake me for her big uncle. we didn't really say much again that night until she asked for my phone number, i gave her sha. by the time we got to our hotel, she had already called me four times, i then said to myself "I'm in trouble"

the next day was saturday and it was the wedding proper, i was the odd one out, all the people i knew were dressed in tux, i was wearing my unstarched blue guniea without a cap. the church service was interesting though long. i felt a vibration in my pocket and it was my new friend calling me, she told me she was outside the church and wanted to see me, i told her i wasn't leaving the church until after the service. after the service i made sure i didn't see her, even at the reception, i saw her looking for me but i somehow managed to escape unseen. 

from our conversation on that friday, she told me she'll be going back to school on monday which implies she won't be able to call until xmas break.suprisingly i haven't heard from her since then. 

HAPPY MARRIED LIFE TO  DAYO AND TOPE

Nov 12, 2011.